To Trust or not to Trust. That is the Question.

trust  |trəst|

noun

1. firm belief in the reliability, truth, ability, or strength of someone or something : relations have to be built on trust | they have been able to win the trustof the others.

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So… what is trust anyways?  What does it mean to trust somebody?  Not just to say I trust you, but to fully put everything you have into their hands knowing it will be ok.  And what do you do when they mess up?  When they do things UNtrustworthy, where do you go with that?  There are many ways to go about it..  Confrontation: assume, ask them, yell, be calm, or just let it go and just forget it happened.  Now, none of these are easy in a situation of this sort.  Confrontation leads to a defensive person.  Not saying anything can stress you out more.  You wonder, “will it ever happen again?”, “what does it mean?”  Honestly, when you are in that situation only you can be the judge of how serious the situation is.  If it repeats itself, it definitely needs to be addressed.  If it’s very minor and only happens once, well everyone makes mistakes, so keep that in mind.

BUT

where’s the fine line?  It’s a question of when do you know to stay and when do you dip out?  And how do you know when to make these tough decisions?  This is something I have struggled with myself, and I don’t have all the answers.  Some situations are black and white- some situations are in a grey area.  Sometimes it’s obvious whether to stay or to go or to trust or to not trust.  Sometimes, however it’s justifiable, sometimes there are excuses, other explanations you never thought of.  But are those true?  Well, do you trust this person?

This can go for any relationship.  A teacher, a boss, a friend, a family member, a boyfriend or girlfriend, yourself even.  And many things go into this.  How long have you known them?  What is their history like?  How close is the relationship?  One thing that I know is hard first of all, how do you trust someone who has hurt you before?  What’s even harder is how do you show someone that you trust them once you do have that trust regained.  Some old habits and insecurities can linger, because you don’t know how else to handle a situation,  and it can send mix messages.  It’s kind of something you have to go through on your own.  It’s more a battle with yourself.  Old you vs. new you.  Only YOU can give yourself your confidence, only YOU can decide who you do and do not trust.

ONLY YOU CAN DO YOU!!!

Never let your past get the best of you, use your best judgement, and eliminate untrustworthy people from your life.  As soon as I started to do this, the circle around me got smaller and smaller, but it got tighter.  The people surrounding you should be inspiring, honest people who push you to be the same!

Trust is a word that goes deep.  I live my life around this word.  Trust and be trusted.  Now, I’ve had some terrible past experiences, but I still trust.  I trust my family, I trust my few friends, I trust my boyfriend.  (I just want to add, even though some people have hurt me that’s where the personal judgement comes in.  Sometimes you will still trust people after they made a mistake.  The people I could not bring myself to trust are gone from my life, but the people I still put my trust into are still very much in my life because I am looking at the big picture and looking at who truly makes me happy.)  Insecurities from being hurt don’t go away over night, but you do have to get over them to be happy with your life.

I am over my insecurities!  I am confident!  I am amazing and happy and anyone who thinks they can do what I do or who thinks they can make me feel otherwise, well they my friend are a fool. =)

"hear me rawr"

The first definition I found on confidence was this:

confidence

noun

1. the feeling or belief that one can rely on someone or something; firm trust 

This goes right along with the first definition I found on trust and what I said about a relationship with anyone in your life.  This one is just as important because you should definitely have confidence in someone you invest your time in, during your life.

The next one to consider is the first one you should learn to master.

• a feeling of self-assurance arising from one’s appreciation of one’s ownabilities or qualities 

Happy Reflecting! 🙂

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