My mom always told me, ‘The devil is charming too.” Many times she was referring to a boy. She was there watching me get hurt and emotionally torn apart by every guy I swore up and down was different. She hasn’t trusted many guys either my sister or I have dated. Mostly because every one before him lied, cheated, and did everything else wrong..well not at first.
At first, they’re nice, charming, sweet, everything you dreamed of..
or are they?
After awhile, they were all the same. Not exactly the same, but each was evil in his own way and left me hurt and devastated. So how do you stop this from happening? How do you stop this vicious cycle?
1 ) Number one, don’t fall so fast.
2 )Be careful.
3 )Have number one in mind at all times. (That’s you!).
4 )Don’t jump in or rush into anything. If its meant to be, you have the rest of your life to move forward, so move slow.
5 )Stop caring so much. Be yourself.
6 )Find the “real him” and the red flags right away. This one isn’t quite so easy. So how do you spot the sketch dudes from the start? Keep your head out of the clouds. It may sound sort of harsh, but this isn’t a fairy tale. It is the real world. Keep your eyes open, be cautious, and stay independent.
True love takes time, when you rush it usually screws up the momentum anyway. A nice guy will always be nice to you. Where a bad guy, will be nice for awhile until you are both comfortable. He begins to manipulate you and treat you badly. And by this point, you’re either so busy making excuses for him that you start to beleive them yourself, you’re too far in the clouds he put you in from the start, or he’s completely manipulating you.
Now, don’t get me wrong a nice guy still makes mistakes. He’s a nice guy, not super man. Everyone makes mistakes, even you. So don’t go ruling out every person who isn’t perfectly perfect, because you will be lonely and looking for a long time. Just know who’s worth it to stick around and work through issues with. Just a little hint, the nice guy will calmly work through it with you and be by your side as you both make mistakes, learn, and continue to grow together.